And then there were 4

We went on Tuesday for the egg retrieval. I had sixteen follicles, some were quite large and Dr. Z knew they would be over mature we kept waiting for my lining to get thicker before we did the transfer. As I woke up from anesthesia I asked my husband "Poso kaneis" again. The same thing I did last time, which in Greek means how much do you cost, not how many were there. Apparently my Greek lessons aren't going so well.

Dr. Z only got 5 eggs out of the 16. She was expecting 7-8. Her exact words to me were "it was a disaster." As she went to get the eggs the first 6-7 were empty, not cyst like she expected but completely empty. No cells at all. She said she had to stick me 3 times for each 16, no wonder I'm sore, spotting and feel like my insides have been ripped apart.

There was talk of doing a 3 day transfer today (Friday) because they didn't think the embryos looked that strong. Not really a good option given my half uterus and if both took we would be up shit creek and be forced to do a reduction at 3 months. Thankfully they seem to be doing well and we are going to do a 5 day transfer. 6pm on Sunday, Valentine's Day and a holiday weekend. Have I mentioned I love my doctor? Hopefully this Valentine's Day will be a good one. 3 years ago is when we went in for our 8 week check up for our first pregnancy only to find out it was a blighted ovum. Here's to new memories of the Hallmark holiday.

I'm going to stay in clinic overnight. Due to my last cervical etopic pregnancy, I'm on strict bedrest from the time they implant until the pregnancy test. I'm thinking of going to my mother in laws for 5 days and then coming back to my house for the last 5 days of bedrest. Only bad thing is she only has Greek TV and no internet. I may go crazy if I stay any longer! I think it will help take some pressure off DH too. It's a shame that husbands are kind of the forgotten ones through all of this. Everyone is so worried about us, they don't think about the emotional toll it takes on them.

Does anyone else talk to their embryos when they drive past their clinic? I know it's stupid but as I was driving home from Greek class I passed by the clinic and told them hello, that their mom and dad loved them and told them to grow. Who have I become?

Here's to a good transfer and hopefully an embryo or two to freeze!

They grow up so fast...

Had another visit with the dildo cam yesterday and my follicles are growing leaps and bounds. I walked into Dr. Z’s office yesterday and the first thing she said to me was “you are only using 75 of Fostimon and 75 of Merional right?” My blood work apparently told her things were going crazy down there. She took me off Fostimon and Merional. She said that even though the follicles were getting very big 16 – 16.5 with only 7 days of stimulation drugs, they weren’t mature. Feel like I’m dealing with an immature teenager who looks like they are 25.

Dr. Z wants to put off the egg retrieval until at least Sunday so that the follicles can mature more. My lining is also till very, very thin and I’m freaking out a little. Ok, not a little, a lot. Hope it grew since yesterday. She said it could be the strange shape of my uterus that creates such a low reading. Hopefully! I’m getting ready to go see her again so we will see how things are going.

Day 7 of Stimming

We're getting close...day 7 of stimulation drugs day 19 of Suprefact. We are 4 blood test, 3 dildo cams and 26 needle pokes in (actually 24 shots but I had to stick myself twice one day and my husband had to do the same). We had an appointment yesterday and the Dr. said all is looking good with my follicles. She's expecting 10 - 12 good quality ones. She changed my meds last night so now I'm on 75 of Fostimon, 75 of Merional and 25 of Suprefact. The names seem to be different in States but oh well, you get the point. She told us yesterday that I make good eggs and we have excellent embryos, now if we can just get my tiny uterus with its microscopic lining to cooperate we'll be in good shape. My lining is only at a 5 and she wants it at an 8 at the very least. I seem to always have this problem so if you know of any good foods I can eat in the next week or so, please, please let me know. I asked the Dr. and she said there was nothing but she would check it again tomorrow and then maybe put me on some pills. At any rate, looks like we'll be doing the retrieval on Sunday or Monday.

I don't want to leave my husband out of this, in addition to being my nurse, he started his antibiotics last night in preparation for his big day.

And a final P.S., I talked to my mom today, my dad is in the hospital, his blood count is realy low and they are doing test to try to figure out how to stop it. This happened last May as well and after a few transfusions, they got it up but never found the leak. I wish I could be there with him this time as well. Sometimes living so far away from home sucks.

And we're off...

Blood test - check
ultrasound - check
daily dose of 225 Fostimon - check
daily dose of 25 Suprefact - check
blood test again on Sunday - check
Dr. appt. Sunday - check
Happy to be really moving forward with this round of IVF - check, check and check

Let's get this party started

Monday's FSH and Estradiol said I wasn't ready to start stimulating so it was 3 more days of Suprefact. No problem, bruising has gone down and I went to the nurse on Monday night for my shot only to come to the conclusion that my DH does a better job. So, every night, Nurse C (my husband) takes me into our spare bedroom which is filled with medicine and needles, (you know the spot, baby making central where everything is laid out for you, you even have the plastic jar that you put all your used needles in. Makes you look a druggie or something) we make some joke about making a baby, give each other a hug and off we go. Never thought this was how I'd make a baby.

Went for another blood test today and am waiting for the Dr. to call. I'm ready to get this party started!

On another note, I got an email from a friend back home telling me to call her. I haven't spoken to her since December and we both had January birthdays so I didn't think anything was up. I left a message for her, I figured I'd catch her this weekend, but NO, I get to work today and this is the email I get:

"Just heard your voicemail, but I am at work until 4pm today.

I don't have your cell number anymore. I called it a few times the other day, but then I dropped my phone in a glass of water and lost all of my numbers.

I want to talk to you because I have some news...I am pregnant!!!!!!!!!!!!!1"

Seriously, this is how you broke the news? I'm happy for you and all but you said you weren't trying when I last talked to you b/c of some problems you were having with your husband, you know I have done one round of IVF and had an etopic pregnancy and your sister did IVF multiple times before she got pregnant (though she's kept it a secret from most of her family and friends which is disturbing to me, the baby is now 3 and they still won't tell anyone) Is she being insensitive? Am I being oversensitive? I am happy for her but I'm a little irritated right now too.

35 and looking forward to a great year!

Yesterday was my 35th birthday. I am now officially in the mid to late 30 category but I feel great, I don't feel old at all. I remember when I turned 30 I had such a hard time because my life was not what I had imagined it to be. I thought I would have been married by then but I was dating my now husband for 6 years and we still weren't engaged. We got engaged later that year so 30 was a good, no great year for me. As 35 approached I have to admit I didn't let myself dwell on it. I did think I would have a child by now but I am confident that 35 will bring me great things. It’s off to a great start, we spend the day in the mountains and it finally felt like winter here, complete with snow and slippery roads. Plus I've already started taking my drugs for IVF #2 so I'm on my way! Here's to a great year. Hopefully my blood test I did this morning (FSH and Estradiol) will come back good and I'll be able to start Fostimon and get off the Suprefact (I think it's Lupron back home). It's not so bad but I do have bruises on my stomach and break down crying every night for no reason. Oh fertility drugs, how I love you!

Oh Giuliana and Bill

I no longer live in the States but I still like to follow trashy TV and magazines. I heard about this show Giuliana and Bill from another blogger and watched some clips on YouTube the other day. What do I think? We'll she's a train wreck, not sure if she is playing the dumb, spoiled girls on purpose but it's a dumb show, though I know that I would watch it if I was at home. Hell, I watched the Jessica Simpson Show, the Kardashians, the Hills all while thinking to myself "are these people serious?" I mean who really lives like this?

Anyway, back to my point, so Giuliana and Bill are having trouble getting pregnant. Does this mean she will be the face of infertility and all that goes with it? Not sure that she's really who I want representing us. I mean I can see her laughing at everything, making a big deal out of daily shots that aren't really so bad and then BAM getting pregnant with twins on the first try, having a breezy pregnancy and being back down to 90 pounds within an hour of giving birth. I mean really, I'm all for someone in the public eye representing us but I'd choose someone else.

Does anyone really believe this? “They hope to use their show as a vehicle to help people feel more comfortable about their situation; whether they are fertile Myrtle’s or having trouble conceiving.” Well, if it’s true then kudos to them.

Oh and by the way, being the doctor that I am and infertility specialist, I think if she would gain a few pounds and live in the same town as her husband she may have better luck. (That was mean wasn't it?) Sorry Giuliana but once I really believe that you are one of us, I'll be nice and supportive.